Whether you’re feeling stuck in a circumstance, in your career, in a mindset, in your physical or emotional healing, I believe that pain is universal and the road to get to the other side looks similar for all of us. I’m going to share a little of my story with you and a mindset shift that has been pivotal for me. I think will be for you too.

Almost two years ago I got test results from my doctor that my gut was basically a bacterial catastrophe.  We spend the next half hour making a plan of attack, and then Stephen (my husband) and I walked back to the parking lot and just stood there as our eyes welled with tears because for the first time in 8 years we felt like we had clear direction.  

The months of treatment that followed brought a whole new layer of feeling sick…I couldn’t take care of myself, I cried every day, and I couldn’t fall asleep some nights because my body was so agitated.  But the pain was expected, because things were literally dying in me, so in a way I was ok with it.  Isn’t that how healing often works?  It can be more painful to take steps forward than to stay in the dysfunction we’re in.

What I didn’t expect (and had way less grace for) was the pain that followed after the treatment.  Once you’ve uprooted things, it’s not over.  You find yourself standing in front of this huge desolate field, and you wonder why there’s still pain, and why you’re still crying every day. It’s like you’ve walked in weary, fought a treacherous battle, and now you’re sitting wounded on the shore wondering if it was actually all worth it. Can you relate to that?  Gosh the reward of the pilgrim is not easily obtained is it.

For me, the “healing pain” manifested in a lot of ways in the months that followed, many of which I went to see specialists for because I was certain that something was still horribly wrong. One of the most mysterious symptoms was a stabbing in my upper intestines that reared its ugly head 7 months after the treatment ended and lasted almost a year and still has to be very mindfully tended to.  We finally concluded that it’s intestinal nerve damage (I’ll talk more about that in a later post), and essentially just a part of the healing process, but at its worse it felt like a landslide.

So here’s what I want you to know…

If you’re in a space where you feel stuck, in your healing process, in emotional or physical pain, in a season of life, in your mindset; whether you’re entering into the battle with clear sight and valor, or you’re sitting on a plundered shore feeling completely lost without an ounce of energy for the road ahead…you don’t have to know how to get to the finish line.

Just take the next best step.

It sounds simple, but that one phrase became (and continues to be) a huge catalyst to freedom.  When we try to get from point A to point Z in our mind, it only makes the storm more unbearable.  But what if you just took the next best step?  Whether it be scheduling an appointment with a doctor or coach, calling a friend, lacing up your gym shoes, apologizing, picking up a paint brush, or just sitting on the couch and eating a banana. Just take the next best step.   

What if you don’t know the next “best” step?  That’s where your intuition gets to hold her beacon bright.  You don’t have to look for it on the internet or search through books (in fact, I highly recommend NOT doing an internet search if your mind and heart is feeling fatigued). Take a deep breath and ask yourself, “What do I need right now?”  You’ll hear a still small voice.  Wait for it to speak, and let it be your guide.

I’m sending you a huge hug and this really big smile today dear friend.  You are valiant and your light is so bright, hold it high as you walk though these shadows.

-Christina